Rancher to the Rescue Page 18

  Then Noah had broken the embrace and walked out. He’d stalled for a moment before brushing past her and down the stairs.

  At the bottom, he’d turned to face her and had said, “I’ll see you at the Recording Office, and after work, I’ll collect the boys.”

  At that moment, Clare had forgotten about work, but remembering Miss Worth and her brothers had been touring the town, she knew she should return to the office.

  So she did. Clare did not speak to either Elizabeth or her father. Yes, they were guests, but they could look after themselves. Mr. Townsend had said those exact words as he’d walked upstairs before his nap.

  It had felt so strange after lunch, returning to work while strangers stayed in her home, with Noah an integral link to all and yet, saying nothing to her for the entire afternoon. Not until he’d retrieved Tim and Leo. Even then, his words had been short and terse, only telling the boys to say goodbye.

  They needed to talk, Clare decided again as she stared into the stable. That was why she was here. After work, she’d said her goodbyes to her brothers and Noah had taken them to the ranch. As if sensing something wasn’t quite right, they’d been quiet and obedient.

  Now she was here. Supper done with, Miss Worth offered to tidy up while the impromptu guests retired early. Clare now took the opportunity to slip out and visit with her fiancé.

  Even after the short ride out here, she had no idea what she wanted to say. It was all she could do just to deal with the wild beating of her heart.

  Was she afraid to ask the obvious questions? She’d heard Elizabeth beg Noah to do what was right to realign their families.

  Noah was honorable. Hadn’t he come to her aid?

  Her heart continued to pound. The knot forming in her throat warned her that she’d better be prepared for bad news.

  But that didn’t mean she wasn’t strong. She could handle this, no matter what the outcome. She could deal with her parents being gone and she could deal with this.

  Her chin up, she walked into the stable to stand under the kerosene lamp. The scents of horseflesh and fuel filled the air. “We need to talk. Now.”

  Noah looked like a deer caught in a coach light when it stepped in front of an approaching wagon. “Now?”

  “Yes, now. Do you have someplace you need to be?”

  “Like checking on your brothers?”

  “I just did. They’re fine.” As soon as she’d arrived, she’d hurried into his ranch house and found the boys, still a bit nervous at the tension in the air, obediently tidying the kitchen. It was a welcome shock to Clare. Yes, they’d done chores before, but only with firm supervision, and never with the attention to detail that they were giving this task now.

  Clare took another step toward Noah. “I think that I deserve an explanation.”

  “About what?”

  “Stop it, Noah. You know perfectly well why we need to talk.”

  He strode out of the stable and sank down on the narrow roughly hewn bench that lined the wall facing the house. Pulling in a restoring breath, and hoping the bench would not snag her skirt, Clare followed him and plunked herself down beside him.

  After a moment of waiting, Clare realized Noah was not planning to start the conversation. “Elizabeth was your fiancée,” she finally stated crisply. “First up, I think that I should have known that small fact before now, but that’s a moot point, so we may as well put that aside.”

  He slid a sideways glance toward her. “Then what else do we need to discuss?”

  His reticence annoying her, she straightened even more. “Noah, what’s going on? Why is Elizabeth here? I can’t believe for a moment it’s because they want a holiday here, or have come to consider moving here. They’ve come because of you. Why?”

  “What did you hear?”

  “I’m sorry for eavesdropping. I came upstairs to let them know I needed to return to work and that Miss Worth had volunteered to see to their needs, if necessary.”

  Noah’s brows lifted briefly. “Miss Worth is full of surprises. I see she even ate half a sandwich today.”

  “She’s not the subject of this conversation. You are.” Yes, Miss Worth was a difficult woman and Clare had disagreed with some of her beliefs, but even with the aside that Miss Worth was invaluable right now, Clare refused to be diverted from the reason she had come this evening.

  When Noah said nothing, Clare pushed on. “I heard only something about Elizabeth asking for help. And I saw you two embracing.” Daringly, she placed her hand on his arm. “Noah, I know I have no right to demand you tell me anything and no right to be hurt or betrayed, but—”

  “Are you?”

  She frowned. “Am I what?”

  “Hurt? Betrayed?”

  She withdrew her hand. Was she? Her heart hadn’t stopped hammering since she spotted him in his stable.

  Oh, dear. Yes, she was hurt, but she didn’t dare admit it. She had no right to his heart, only his name, and only because he’d agreed to help her out by marrying her. In two days’ time, they would exchange vows, pledge to keep themselves only for each other and be joined as man and wife.

  Two days? Panic flared in her. She was going to marry a man who was deeply embroiled in something she didn’t understand.

  He had two days to back out. Would he? While fear clutched at her, she recognized another emotion.

  Sadness.

  Clare pulled in a long, deep breath. She needed to stay strong, because she knew she could never lie. “Yes, it hurts. I won’t lie to you. I know it shouldn’t, but regardless, it does.” She gripped his arm tightly. “But whatever happens, Noah, please let me help you with it. You’ve done... I mean, you’re doing so much for me. Let me help you in return.”

  * * *

  Noah laid his hand over Clare’s. A scant few hours ago, another woman had been this close to him, even closer, but she’d been begging him for help because she’d forced them both into a difficult situation, one built on a lie, and she had expected Noah to save her and her pride.

  You caused the situation in the first place.

  Hating the accusation, he stared at Clare. She had refused his help initially. Noah knew she’d want to help him regardless of whether or not they were engaged. She was that kind of person.

  But help him how? By releasing him from the burden that was this marriage of convenience, so he could heal two families? To preserve one woman’s pride?

  Carefully, painfully, he peeled her hand free of his arm. “It’s all my fault, Clare. First, by what I refused to do, and second, by allowing a lie to stand as the truth.”

  “Start from the beginning,” she answered softly.

  “My father and Elizabeth’s father own companies that complement each other. They manufacture various steam engine components. A merger would benefit them, and they’d be stronger and bigger than just the sum of the two.” He cleared his throat, then went on. “They’d been friends for years, too. I think they were old school buddies, playing together even, although, back then, boys were expected to work hard with no time to play. Each would have had to learn the family business, unlike now. Boys get just a few chores and get to go to school, even though here in Colorado there is no compulsory law.”

  “I read in the newspaper that it will come within the decade.”

  “I’m sure it will. Suffice it to say, my father and Rupert had known each other a long time. Then, almost four years ago, they decided that I should marry Elizabeth and take over a merged version of both their companies. I don’t believe that they’d considered the idea until their businesses were mature enough to benefit from a merger.”

  “Why was that so bad?”

  Noah pursed his lips, probably too tightly. “They told no one until only a few months before the wedding date, just over two years ago. They’d set that date
based on what was best for their businesses and no other reason.” He blew out a frustrated breath. “But I wanted to decide my own life. I still do. I was twenty, and frankly not very mature. I just thought I was. I want to be successful at what I do, not be successful at something that was already doing well. I also didn’t want to be managed as though I was a business acquisition. Long story short? I didn’t want to have my life completely dictated before it even started.”

  “But surely your father would retire eventually?”

  “Back then, it seemed too long a time for that to happen. Besides, I wanted to go West, to be my own person. I like working with horses, and hated that animals were often mistreated. They are an integral part of our country. They have helped to shape it as much as any of us. They are God’s creation, too.”

  “What did you tell your father?” Clare looked rapt, as if holding her breath and afraid for his answer.

  “Nothing. At first, my father didn’t tell me about the arrangement, I think in part because he just assumed I would do his bidding. He was that arrogant. He just kept me employed at our business. Just over two years ago, our family started to see more of the Townsends when Rupert and my father began to talk openly about a merger. Then my father told me what he expected of me. I told him I wanted to marry only for love, that I want a wife who could share my vision and my dreams.”

  Beyond them, Turnip neighed with great disapproval. For the briefest second, Clare almost flinched. From that pony’s disgust, or what he had said, Noah wasn’t sure.

  “My father demanded I do as he said,” he continued, “but I am as stubborn as he is. I told him no, and that I was coming out here to start my own life.”

  “How did Elizabeth take that? Or did she even know about the engagement yet?”

  Noah thought a moment. He actually felt better just discussing it. “She’d found out around the same time. But her father would have played to her pride. It’s her downfall. When I told her I wasn’t going to marry her, she did not take the news well, as you can imagine.” He scowled darkly. “She couldn’t stand the thought that she had been passed over for the West. I was so stubborn in my defiance, that she said it made her look like an ugly sow whose fiancé would rather roam the West like a vagrant than settle down to a fine career with her as his wife.”

  Clare cringed. “Did she really say that?”

  “Yes, and more. All of her friends were married, and she felt it was a slight against her. More than a slight, I guess. She was humiliated and demanded that I tell everyone that she broke off the engagement because she’d wanted something better.”

  “But your parents knew the truth.”

  “Yes, but that wasn’t the worst part. I left the next day, so angry with my parents, I vowed never to speak to them again. I was...” He paused, and then hung his head. “I was a lot of awful things. Worse, there was the lie Elizabeth had told her parents—that she had ended the engagement. Letting it stand was the least I could do for her after humiliating her. But as time went on, the lie festered in me.”

  And now? He looked down at Clare. For the last week, the festering had eased, although hadn’t left completely.

  “And your father?” Clare asked. “Surely he and Mr. Townsend talked, or were they too mad at each other?”

  “They talked, but when Rupert told my father that Elizabeth ended our engagement, because she had told him that, my father denied it. They fought. So much so, there is a rift between the families now.”

  “‘Oh, what a tangled web we weave,’” Clare quoted softly.

  Noah stared off into the distance. Should he tell Elizabeth’s father the truth? Would it crush the man to learn his daughter had lied to him and he’d been perpetuating that lie ever since? And to have Noah be the one to tell him? Mortifying.

  “This is the first time I’ve ever talked about it. You can see my dilemma. If I tell Rupert the truth, I will be breaking a promise I made to Elizabeth. If I lie to him, or even allow the lie to stand, how can I call myself a Christian?”

  “You’ve told me the truth. Was it hard? I think the truth is always best. You don’t have to remember a lie. You simply have to remember what happened.”

  Noah nodded slowly. “I wanted to tell you before now. But I believed I couldn’t break my promise to Elizabeth.”

  Their gazes collided and both looked away just as quickly. “And me?” Clare asked quietly. “What about the promise you are supposed to make to me on Friday?”

  “I’m sorry, Clare.”

  She gasped softly but he pushed on. “I should have told you about Elizabeth as soon as we were engaged. It wasn’t fair for you to learn about her this way. I promise I won’t keep anything from you again.”

  A small frown creased her brow briefly. “What’s wrong?” he asked.

  She seemed to pull herself together. “Nothing.” She smiled abruptly but it looked a bit forced. When she reached out, she squeezed his arm. “It was a lie you made because you never expected to deal with them again.” She cleared her throat. “But it was serious nonetheless.”

  “Yes. I believed it was okay because I thought I wasn’t lying to anyone, and I thought it wasn’t hurting anyone. My engagement to you changed that.”

  “Now that Elizabeth is here, what’s going to happen?”

  He looked into her anxious expression. She shifted her attention away. “I’m sorry. I’m concerned about the house. If you tell Mr. Townsend, he’ll pack up and leave. I just got used to the idea of renting it. I’ll be back at square one, like that silly board game Leo loves.”

  She looked back up at him again, looking contrite. “But I’m being selfish. I shouldn’t be so concerned about the house. Please forgive me. Your dilemma is far more vexing than my situation.”

  She believed she was being selfish? Hardly. Her situation was far worse. She still didn’t know the truth about her parents. She had to think about her brothers and sacrifice so much for them.

  While here he was, unsure of what to do, and worse, unburdening himself on her as if she could solve his problems. They were problems he’d created himself.

  “What exactly does Mr. Townsend expect to get out of coming here?”

  Noah sank back against the rough slabs of wood that were the stable’s outer walls. He shut his eyes. He didn’t want Clare to see anything in his expression that he hadn’t carefully thought through.

  Because he hadn’t thought through anything yet.

  “I think you’ve already figured that out.” With his eyes still closed, he murmured, “Rupert wants Elizabeth to reconcile with me. He thinks if he puts us together, she will acquiesce and I will take her back. He may even think that having lived in the wilds of Colorado for several years I would be pining for civilization.”

  He heard Clare’s soft gasp and opened his eyes. The urge to wrap his arms around her swelled in him, but theirs wasn’t that kind of engagement. She didn’t love him. Her gasp was one of surprise and worry.

  Her eyes, wide as saucers, focused on him. “And since he doesn’t know that you ended the engagement?”

  “He knows Elizabeth only wants to remain comfortable and keep her standard of living. At least she hasn’t lied about that.”

  “But in that whole time from his first suggestion of this trip, right up until now, she has never told him the truth?”

  “She said she couldn’t. When her mother died shortly after I arrived here, her father was bereft. He’d not only lost his wife, but shortly before that, he’d lost a good friend in my father.”

  Clare’s expression clouded. “That poor man! I’ll pray for him.”

  Again, Noah looked in awe at her. She’d lost her parents; even though he’d told her not to give up hope, he’d no more believed they were coming home than she did. They were lost at sea, and all he’d wanted was for her to wait for the right
time to tell her brothers, after she’d accepted the sad news in her heart.

  Nevertheless, there she was empathizing with another person whose loss was just as great. She was setting aside her pain to help Rupert, who wanted to send her life off the rails again.

  Noah’s thoughts wandered to Miss Worth. The critical woman would have taught those values of prayer and selflessness. She’d also been no-nonsense about doing her share to help Clare after arriving so unexpectedly. While Elizabeth and her father had simply arrived and hoped they would get into the house sooner rather than later, no doubt treating everyone around them as little more than servants.

  “What are you thinking?” Clare asked gently.

  He flicked up his eyebrows. “I was thinking about Miss Worth.”

  A small, confused smile flickered over her lips. “Miss Worth? I got the distinct impression that you don’t like her.”

  “I don’t approve of what she generally believes, such as the strictness and frugality she would like to see us all practice, but today, for instance, she took your brothers so we could spend a few minutes together. She’s done her share of the regular chores. She’s taught you to help to carry others’ burdens by doing so herself. You’ve done that by praying for Rupert.”

  “Maybe my parents taught me before I went to college.”

  He said nothing, but in doing so, he knew he was conveying to Clare that he didn’t agree. She leaned forward to capture his wavering look. “Noah? I know you don’t really think my father did the right thing taking all the money.” Her gaze turned pensive as she flicked it around the slowly darkening yard. He couldn’t see any tears in her eyes, but there was a catch in her throat as she continued, “I am still angry at him, too, for how he’s left us in this bind. But I don’t want anyone else to think that way. Maybe it’s like you say, that I think it’s the only part of my father I have left.” She suddenly drew in a sharp breath. “It’s time I dealt with it.”